Glass Tears of Blood
by G Chan85
Summary: *CHAPTER 2 IS NOW FIXED!!!!* Shinjis story about his life...the problems he deals with the pressures hes put up to, can he handle it? Can he stay away from Asuka and her desire for him? Read and Fins out please review too
1. Default Chapter

"Why am I here? What have I done? What do they want with me?"  
  
I shot up out of my bed, my music blasting in my ear and my thoughts all jumbled and running everywhere. I placed one foot onto the cold hard wood floor then turned and looked at the objects in my room. My breath was shortened and quick; my eyes scurried from object to object. I threw the blanket off of my half naked body then gripped down hard onto the sheets. I closed my eyes then released my grip on the sheets. I rose my hands to my head and grabbed my head tightly. I took a long deep breath in then.I screamed. *~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~*  
  
"Shinji!" A light rapping sound was heard from the other side of the door. I pulled my knees up to my chest and pressed the pillow down harder over my head.  
  
"Shinji, please.I understand why you are in there.come out.please."  
  
I closed my eyes. No! She doesn't know why, none of them do. Why? Why am I here? What do they want from me? Don't they see? I am just a kid, I'm only 15. I'm not responsible for someone else's life. I'm not even responsible for my own self. I just want to die; I want to go away from here, far from here.  
  
"Shinji, please." The voice began to trail off as I could hear the sound of a body sliding down against my door.  
  
"Misato." I whispered softly. I close my eyes in pain. I was doing it again. I was causing others pain because of my stupidity. I have to stop running away!  
  
"Misato!" I screamed.  
  
I heard her scramble to her feet; she banged her fist against the door. Tears streamed down my cheeks.  
  
"Shinji!" she banged against the door "Shinji, open up Shinji"  
  
I opened my eyes and looked at the door. A dark pain slipped into my heart causing me to suffer and experience heartache.  
  
"Misato.I don't want to pilot the EVA.I don't want to be apart of this anymore!"  
  
She stopped banging and fell silent. I could hear the diminutive sound of her lips parting as she opened her mouth to speak again.  
  
"Shinji.I understand what you have gone through but, we need you.you are here to save the world from the."  
  
"Why! So man can destroy one another? If Angel's don't destroy us man will! So what's the point?"  
  
"God damn it Shinji!" She bashed her fist against the door.  
  
I picked up my blanket and moved it off of me and to the other side of the bed. I picked up my head off the pillow then sat upright and looked at the door. I straightened my legs out and stood up. My legs were shaky and weak, but I was able to make it to the door. I sat down at the door then leaned my back against it. I closed my eyes and sighed. I opened my eyes and looked behind me at the door and asked,  
  
"Misato.?"  
  
She made a faint sound.  
  
"Why...Why am I a pilot?"  
  
"You are a pilot because it was supposed to be this way."  
  
I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them, resting my head.  
  
"Why me?"  
  
She sighed then spoke, "I don't know." *~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~* 


	2. Shinji's advancements and Asuka's surpri...

The sun's morning rays beamed into my room through my window and it hit down on my face. I stirred a bit, tossing and turning, from side to side. I grumbled and opened my eyes. The pupils grew larger then quickly went small.  
  
"Ah!" I rose my arm up to my face, blocking the sun from hitting me in the eye. I sat upright and then swung my legs over the edge of the bed and sat there. I rubbed my eyes and yawned slightly. Today Rei, Asuka, and I had to go to Nerv headquarters to get our sync ratios checked. Asuka is currently higher than me; it's like her goal to be better than me always. I hope mind didn't go up; I really do for Asuka's sake. We arrived at the lab and Ritsuko told us to suit up and go inside our EVAs. Of course we did what we were told to do. After we got out Ritsuko told us that my sync ratio had gone up 3 more points. Asuka looked off because I was really close to beating her. I looked at her confused. I really don't understand why she needs to be better than me always.  
  
I sighed; 'Maybe it's a German thing' I shrugged walking away with my hands in my pockets. Asuka ran up to me and smacked me in the back of the head.  
  
"Shichkoff! Why did you have to go and get higher?"  
  
I looked at her confused; I truly was confused, "Uh, I'm sorry?" She was so frustrated with me she threw her arms up in the air in rage.  
  
"Forget it third child, your small brain can't comprehend." I narrowed my brows, "Hey! That's not true!"  
  
She put her hands on her hips then placed all her weight on her left foot, "Sure it isn't third child" She laughed.sort of.  
  
Seeing her laugh in turn made me smile and get pink in the face. Rei walked by us and Asuka started with her.  
  
"Well if it isn't wonder girl." She walked up to her, "Hi Rei.what's up?" Rei looked at her and didn't say anything.  
  
"Boy wonder girl don't you have a say, a real motor-mouth." The elevator doors opened and Rei walked inside. She turned around facing forward then looked at Asuka.  
  
"I believe you already have that title." And the doors closed. Asuka threw a fit! She bashed her hands against the elevator door and began to curse in German. I walked up from behind her and touch her shoulder slightly.  
  
She whipped around violently, "What!" She went to go and smack me but I grabbed her hand and kissed her. I pushed her up against the wall and continued to kiss her. Her eyes were open and in shock but the sweetness of my touch calmed her down and she closed her eyes. I let go of her hand and placed the palm of my hand against the wall and supported my weight on it. I pulled away from our kiss and looked her in the eyes.  
  
"Asuka I," When suddenly, Misato walked down the hall rummaging through papers in her green folder. She looked up and saw me leaning into Asuka.  
  
"Oh? Am I interrupting something?" Misato laughed but I was red in the face, Asuka was a deep purple red.  
  
I leaned off the wall and shook my arms, "No no it's not like that!"  
  
She nodded and leaned back a bit, "Sure sure" she chuckled, "I'm sure it's not."  
  
I placed my arms behind my head and began to laugh. I laughed so hard I dropped my hands from behind my head and wrapped them around my stomach so tightly holding in the inside to prevent them from coming out, or so it felt. I began to laugh even harder that I fell to the floor and tears were flooding my eyes. Misato looked at me then Asuka and she let out a small smile. Asuka in return started to giggle. In enough time all three of us were laughing. *~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~*  
  
I lied back in my bed and looked up at the ceiling. It was gray and dull. These walls were the kind they use in mental hospitals no wonder. They're enough to drive any one insane. The sound of grasshoppers and crickets could be heard outside. The sound of them took a ride on the wind stream as it drifted its way into my room.  
  
"They're out early tonight." I thought aloud.  
  
I looked at the crack under the door and saw a light turn on. Shadows moved across then went away. A door shut then the lights turned off. A few minutes later I could hear the muffled sounds of people talking.  
  
"Either Asuka has a friend over or." I smirked, "Kaji's over again."  
  
I leaned over and grabbed my walkman. Just as I went to put them on I heard Misato let out a soft cry, I laughed then placed the headphones in my ears. I hit the button and soft music flooded my ears. I closed my eyes and began to drift. I heard my door slide open then shut. I opened my eyes and there was Asuka. She was striping off her clothes then she looked at me. I sat up and took off one of my earphones and looked at her.  
  
"Asuka what are?" She walked over to me and pushed me back down into the bed. She swung her leg over me and straddled my sides. She looked at me lovingly. I looked at her confused and wide eyed, I was blushing, a lot. She grabbed her hair collecting the pieces and loving it to the left shoulder. I was surprised she was only in a bra and panties in front of me. She reached her hand to behind her but stopped. She leaned into me and looked at me. She placed her fingers on my lips and examined them. She pressed her lips against mine ever so delicately. She took my hand and led it to her back. I felt her bra strap. I freaked. She broke our kiss.  
  
"Open it" she cried out in an ic state. My hand began to tremble as I fumbled with the two hooks on the bra strap I gulped down hard.  
  
"Asuka I."  
  
"Please Shinji"  
  
"This isn't right"  
  
"But it feels so good." She looked at me with these sad eyes, "Please Shinji, please."  
  
I swallowed my pride and unhooked the bra and it slide down her arms. I pulled it off and handed it to her. She took it from me and threw it to the other side of the room. I began to feel my boxers getting tight as seeing her naked chest aroused me beyond belief. I was getting fidgety and she laughed at my problem.  
  
"Looks like I'm not the only one excited about this." She smiled, her tone was half kidding half serious. I laid there with my arms to the side of my body, being a good boy, a good boy.  
  
"Shinji?"  
  
"Hm?"  
  
She leaned into me and pulled off my shirt, her soft breasts pressing into my cold chest, my nipples got hard and my boxers became even tighter, the elastic was digging into my skin.  
  
"Do you think we'll be loud?"  
  
My eyes bugged out by her question,  
  
"Asuka I.I.I."  
  
She giggled and bit my neck lightly, "I mean do you think we'll drown them out."  
  
She looked at the wall where Misato's room was. I looked at the wall as well then at Asuka. I brought my hand up her face and gently brushed my fingers along her jaw line and I lifted her face up.  
  
"Is that what this is all about Asuka?" I could see tears in her eyes as her face met mine. A single tear fell from her eye and slid down her cheek I wiped it away with my thumb and looked at her. "Oh, Asuka." I sat up and hugged her tight, she sobbed softly on my shoulder as I stroked her hair reassuring her.  
  
"We don't need to do anything tonight you can stay here and rest with me if you'll feel better." She looked up at me and nodded; she shimmied her way down a bit and rested her head and arm on my chest. She brushed her fingertips across my naked chest for a bit then she stopped and just rested her hand on me. Her icy touch gave me chills through out my entire body. I looked at her and smiled, I felt bad for her. I reached over and grabbed my blanket I pulled it over us both.  
  
"Good night Asuka." I combed my fingers through her hair one more time then I closed my eyes. Immediately sleep took over me and I stayed in that position all night. *~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~* 


End file.
